STELLAR
I’m always recording any flash of inspiration I feel. If it appears, I’ll literally run to a quiet spot, open up my voice notes and go. Desperate for even a piece of it before it’s gone. Catch me singing or humming into my phone in the most random places at the most random times.
I have hundreds of melodies, chords, songs, sounds, visual ideas, just sitting in my voice notes. Each one like a single word to remind me of the sentence it participated in during that chapter of my life. STELLAR is one example. A single frame of the dense layers in a moment expressed through my art and creativity.
She and her:
This was a voice note I left my future self to capture the feeling of a moment. A moment I’ll never experience again. One full of unique emotions only existing in that specific time, amalgamated from the details and experiences of that exact second.
Stellar:
June 2020 I was working at DHL at LAX. I got “lucky” enough to have a job that didnt shut down when the rest of the world did. I enjoyed how much more quiet everything was. I remember I was sitting in my car outside a 7-eleven in Gardena.
I could hear the melody playing from the sounds of the city. The few cars speeding, the wind against the palm trees, the sun over the pavement . All of it like an orchestra endlessly performing.
Then I just mumbled my instrument and tried to plug in the words that represent me within it all.
2undrstndUrslf:
Tapped into the moment, I played the chords that felt like June 11th, 2020.
Once I’m in it, all the other components seem to fall out of the sky and into my lap. I never know how I know, but I know that I’ll know. It’s a weird thing. Like a divine stream flowing effortlessly right to me.
I just knew that these chords I was playing belonged to the words from the past week I had been hearing. So I was figuring out how to fit the pieces best to share my perspective of life at that time.
It’s ok you can laugh. I laugh when I hear it all too. It’s funny, and beautiful.
btw have you ever reminisced of the past and felt this weird feeling that only exists when thinkin bout that period of your life?
Nostalgia seems so broad of a term to use for how many different feelings each different memory brings.
These moments-we will never feel again in the same way. The equation will never be exactly as it was in the previous moment.
I think emotions are a unique experience relative to each individual.
We always filter what we feel into a bracket of predetermined definitions. We use words to describe feelings that words rarely can explain.
Anyways…I like capturing how it feels to be me at specific times with all the things on my mind and all the influences of the variables around me weighing in before it all changes and that experience is lost forever… && this is one example of how I do that. thx